So I've decided to start a blog about my New Years resolution, my diet. Ya I know, everyone has that resolution every year, and they always fail at it. I know from experience. Every year I tell myself that this is the year, and after a month into the new year, I've already forgotten all about the diet.
But this year is different, for several reasons.
My goal for the last 3 years has been to become a police officer. I admit that I haven't done much about it, though. My effort at going to the gym and losing weight has been minimal. And I need to work on both to be able to apply.
If I had to run to keep myself alive, then i'd die within the first few minutes. I hate running. Period. The only time I don't mind running is in sports, like soccer. Otherwise, I hate running on the treadmill, or outside for that matter.
Compared to other women my age, i'm quite strong. I have no problems lifting weights, and can do quite a bit. Sometimes I tell myself that some of my weight is muscle, although I know most of it is just fat. One of those lies you tell yourself to hide the truth and give you temporary happiness.
I was away at a cottage for the new years weekend, and I knew it would be impossible to start exactly on the first day of January, so I started my diet on Monday, January 3rd.
I woke up that morning, and knew that time had come to weigh myself. Stripping down to nothing, I took a breath and got on the scale. 216.4 lbs. I shook my head in disgust. In the last 2 years, I let myself gain over 50 lbs. I never weighed myself until I noticed the changes in my body.
I forgot to weigh myself today, but yesterday I was 211.8 lbs. I dropped about 4 lbs in a week. I haven't gone to the gym since the wedding (October 2010), but I do plan on going once I get into a regular work schedule. Hopefully that'll be in a week or two. All i've done since that Monday was trying to eat less. I haven't really aimed for eating healthy, although I am reading into it and trying some new recipes. Right now it's just been sandwiches, and maybe something else once in awhile. I did crack once last week, and I went to McDonald's. I felt horrible after eating it, but what's done is done. The worst part came that morning when my husband found out I had gone to McDonald's. He found the bag in the garbage. I could see the look of disappointment in his face, which made me sad and angry at the same time. He's also trying to diet, and he told me that when I eat junk, it's like he's eating it too. That we're supposed to be doing this together. I cried that morning on my way to pick someone up for the airport. I let myself down, and I let him down.
So this is where i'm at right now.
Weight: 211.8 lbs
Chest: 41 inches
Bicep: 14 inches
Waist: 40 inches
Hip: 49 inches
Thigh: 30 inches
Calf: 18 inches
(I'm hoping that I measured these correctly)
Body Mass Index: 36.4 (Which, according to the National Heart Lung and Blood Institute, makes me considered obese for my age and height)
So as you can see, it's bad. I went to my doctor yesterday and asked about being referred to a nutritionist/dietician. She said that I need to go in for blood testing, etc. Only if something comes up, like high cholesterol or diabetes, will the specialist accept me as a patient. The last time I went for testing (a few years ago) everything was good. Although back then I was a lot skinnier and lighter.
One last thing, before I finish today's post. The reason i've decided to make my "quest" public is because I think it'll help me lose weight quicker. If I know that people are reading what I write, and that they're now aware of how much I weigh, then it'll motivate me to shed the pounds. I don't want to be the fat girl at the party. And I want to start wearing sexy clothes, not just jeans and tshirts :P
See ya tomorrow!
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